Dear Future Husband

November 18, 2017

Image result for dear future husband

photo cred - Erica Lee Photography

"You lift my heart up
When the rest of me is down
You, you enchant me, even when you're not around
If there are boundaries, I will try to knock them down
I’m latching on babe
Now I know what I have found
I feel we're close enough
I wanna lock in your love
I think we’re close enough
Could I lock in your love, baby?"

Dear Future Husband,

If you've made it this have accomplished a feat no man has yet married me! Lol You have calmed the savage beast - you understand this joke because you know how I am. You obviously know about my love of Sam Smith because his music will somehow be incorporated into our wedding festivities. Your winnings include: well ME lol, a lifetime of love, adventure, debates, witty/smart ass one liners, beautiful kids, someone who has got your back and most importantly a real life partner. 

As additional compensation, you will be spoiled, encouraged, motivated, supported and have a road dawg as you accomplish your dreams. You will have access to unlimited laughs on both good days and bad days. You will fall more in love with me daily as we take this journey together and learn more and more about each other.

It's not just about what one person can do for the other, but what we can do for each other. I also guarantee that I will only be selfish to the extent that is required to fill myself up until I am full enough to give from my cup to yours and everyone else's. I promise that in everything I do it will be with you and our family unit in mind first. I promise to make parenting a team effort. I will always keep you in the loop when making any sort of major decisions pertaining to our kids.

I will give you your space when needed. I truly understand the need to be alone and decompress sometimes. I vow to let you grow at your own pace and support you in that process of change. I promise to chronicle the best part of our lives together in an anthology of poetry. I usually can only write when I am heartbroken or my heart is full. Your task is to keep me feeling like the latter. I'll cook for you and with you. We'll have regular date nights even if that has to be at home in our own space. 

In return, all I ask of you is the aforementioned and more. I require your attention, affection, protection, love and fidelity. I require your best. I don't want pieces of you, but the whole thing. I don't want to be told what you think I want to hear, but what you truly feel and mean. It's pertinent that you hear me, listen to me and that we can find solutions together. Our relationship won't be perfect because we aren't, but as long as we communicate we can solve any problem. 

Physically, let's just say we're all adults here and you can let your imagination roam...I'll be your Dorothy in the streets and Blanche in the sheets lmfao. We'll stimulate each other's minds and bodies and use our time together to explore and discover. 

I promise the story we write together will be done of love, respect, kindness and perseverance. A life filled with laughter, happiness, kids, family and strength in the face of adversity. We'll be two lives intertwined into one unit, us against the world. 

If for ever, any reason you become a different person with different needs who can no longer provide the love and care you once did to me and ours, it might be time for you to go. Love does not hurt, but love does grow and change. If your love changes in a way that can't be fixed, let me go. I promise to love you enough to do the same. 

With love,
Your future wife,
Cicely aka the Bougie Beauty Babe

No Ordinary Love

October 25, 2017

"I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give

I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love 
Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby "

photo: Staci Marie Photo, MUA: Pose Artistry

Break ups are super shitty. I have never opened up about one on a blog before now. Guess there's a first time for everything! Some of the greatest pain I've ever felt is loving someone you KNOW is not right for you. I mean you know so deeply that your own conscious is like GIRL!!! I'm intuitive, yet my heart wants to believe in the good in people.  My brain says face the facts, but my heart leads me into all sorts of painful situations. I'm not going to dwell on the pain, but yet on the many lessons I'm taking from it. Love is such a beautiful and powerful, intangible thing when it happens between the right people. The right love is force. I'm going to give you some introspection on what I NOW know after loving and giving of myself to the same person for close to 4 years: 

Love Lesson 1 : What you allow will continue. EVERY. SINGLE.TIME. You set the precedent, the groundwork, the expectation for how you want to be treated by your partner.

Love Lesson 2: Don't let your unhappiness turn you into someone you are not. IF your relationship/partner is not helping you to be the best version of yourself and live your very best life..."you needa CUT IT!"

Love Lesson 3: The kids are aware. Kids pay attention to your relationships and interactions with others. They are ALWAYS watching. Make sure that the relationships you have with others (especially romantic) set the tone for the way your child(ren) will see relationships in a positive light and will hopefully go on to emulate as they get older. 

Love Lesson 4: You can NOT give from an empty cup. Self care and then everyone else care. You can't give of yourself what you literally don't have to give. Fill your cup and keep that baby full until you have enough to share with those who deserve it the most.

Love Lesson 5: Be with someone who lifts you up. Mentally, physically and emotionally. Be a positive force in their lives, but most importantly be GETTING that in return. What good is all the positive energy you're sharing with someone and the positive force you're being for them if they can't or won't reciprocate?

Love Lesson 6 : If a man can't give me that 90s R&B, weak in the knees, Anthony Hamilton "The Point of It All", makes my heart skip a beat, makes me want to be the queen to his king, wife to his husband, buy a house and have a whole few more babies, a dog, cat, makes me wanna take him home to meet my mama and 'nem, putting up with my moods and quirks, oh i think that I found myself a cheer-lead-er, enjoys giving massages, listens to my poetry, always thinking of me first and then himself, wants to raise a stepson, writes lyrics about me, tells me I'm beautiful every day, wants to build a future, yin to my yang, willing to walk to the ends of the Earth for me, showing AND telling kinda love.....I DON'T FUCKING WANT IT! If a man is not willing to do that and more....#ByeFelipe. I already know what I have given to men who didn't deserve it, I can only imagine what I can give to someone who gives me REAL LOVE. 

Until again,

Bougie Beauty Babe

Turning 8 is Great!

October 7, 2017

My handsome boy. I just love his eyes and his sweet soul. <3 

I can't believe that my little baby will be 8 years old on October 16. I definitely feel like he just got here. I remember my pregnancy with Liam and the moments leading up to his birth so clearly! Although at the time I'm writing this his birthday is a little over a week away, in true bougie fashion I had some pictures taken of him and me.

He was long overdue for some portraits and it had been almost four years since we had pictures done together. I'm so excited to have these memories captured on film. Life with my Liam is beautiful. I wouldn't trade any of it for the world.

So without further ado, here are some favorites from our shoot! Enjoy :).

Until again,

Bougie Beauty Babe

Life & Death

September 1, 2017

It has been a cool 2 months since my last blog. For that I apologize. When I tell you that life has thrown me some curve balls....I'm in the throes of it rett nah! I'm going to just jump right into the heavy hitting stuff:

Me, Justin & Justin's Mom at her bday party <3

My friend Justin Wilson passed away July 6. I had known him for a whole 13 years. We even worked together for a couple years before he had a stroke that not only harmed him, but made him stop doing work that he loved. But he bounced back! He was stronger than ever. Funny and sarcastic and annoyingly honest and always and bout to embark on the new chapter of his life as a husband and stepfather.

He was always there for a good laugh, a shoulder to lean on, a good time and ready to have your back if any shit popped off. I was happy for my friend. I was rooting for my friend. I was ready to accompany him on that journey. He's gone entirely too soon. It was ridiculous and surreal to stare at him in that casket. To see that same shit eating grin he was always wore. To realize I would never see him alive again Rest easy friend. Until we meet again.

me and Alicia...also work on me by Alicia #PoseArtistry

My sista-friend Alicia Williams passed away Sunday, August 6 and I'm still reeling and trying to process the emotions from that. I loved this girl. She was positive, real, beautiful, talented. She truly inspired me. Our calls and texts/messages were literally like hype sessions lol. I literally felt like I could take over the world after talking to her and really find my niche catering to women AND people who look like me.

She encouraged me in my educational/business endeavors and she bounced ideas off of me. She was an introvert to my extrovert and I learned to adapt in a way that didn't drain all her damn energy lol. I can truly say I am blessed to have had her in my life for the short 3 years that we knew each other. She is a loss not only to those who knew and loved her, but also to our local makeup artist community at large.

I'm so glad she's no longer suffering nor bothered with these worldly problems, but that doesn't lessen the blow.

Until next time y'all,
Bougie Beauty Babe

2017: Month 6

June 7, 2017

Happy June!

While I may be currently failing at blogging, let me be clear that I’m making strides in other aspects of life lol! It’s been 5 weeks since I started my new full time job working for an awesome newer retailer and I love it. I have also come to the realization of quite a few things during that time. While I love beauty and skincare, retail is not my forever destination. I seek a life of more autonomy and being able to create and govern my own schedule. While retail DOES offer some flexibility, bending to the whim of every holiday for capital gain is not my speed anymore. In saying that, I’m not knocking my current company or any other retailer because they are all there for the same end goal: to make money. What I value more is time and scheduling freedom and the ability to continue to climb the salary ladder.
                                   Image result for following your dreams

So what’s on the horizon for the Bougie Beauty Babe? Nursing school. I start the 3 semester program at BCTC this fall for the next 3 semesters (graduation is December 2018) and will then spend another 3 semester in LPN to RN bridge (looking at Spring 2020) and THEN begin work in on an ADN to MSN bridge with the end goal being a Master’s degree in Nursing.  That is where I’ve always wanted to end up since this journey began. With consecutive school (i.e. not nan break – points if you caught the Trick Daddy reference lol), that should put me at finishing school sometime in the next 4ish years. Seems a bit far off, but that’s errythang! 3 nursing degrees and the ability to work as a Nurse Practitioner.    
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Liam and I are challenging ourselves to read several times a week and also workout! It’s not going quite as well as I’d like, but he’s helping me stick to my guns 😊.  My next weight loss goal is to lose about 35 lb. From there I will have about 60 lb to go to get to my final goal weight. It seems much more doable in 30 lb chunks. I will be doing at least one more round of hCG diet, probably 2.
I’m back on the part time job circuit. In my quest to reduce debt and eventually be debt free, there was really no other solution. Since buying a car and taking on a car payment, it was the only way I could reach my goals. I’m going to try and work all I can while school is out. Once August hits, it will be a new ball game. I have 3-4 smaller debts I am specifically targeting to pay off by the time August 14 hits (1st day of classes).

Me & Liam after my friend and MUA Alicia Williams of Pose Artistry did me up <3

On another equally important and positive note, my hair is growing and my face is glowing! Lol Get into this lenff!!!! I may have finally mastered this natural hair life! My hair feels the best it has in a while, I need a trim, but otherwise I have no complaints! So tell me what's going on in your first half of 2017!
When your skin is outchea glowing and your hair is outchea growing lol

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Skin On Fleek

May 4, 2017

I have been trying to be much more conscious of my body and how to better myself mentally, physically and spiritually. Since ending the hCG diet at -18 lb, I have discovered a lot about what my former diet was doing or NOT doing for me. Dairy and breads have to be extremely limited or they GOTTA GO completely! I'm not quite ready to release them yet lol, but seeing the change and results in my skin and in my level of bloat/inflammation, that day is coming soon. 

Now that I have been off of hCG for a full week and introduced some dairy and a few grains back into my diet, my skin is giving me a BIG middle finger. It's not about this life and I have had texture and inflammation galore. I started my new job April 22 and have been introduced to many new cosmetics and skincare lines. One that currently has my heart is Tata Harper. 

Image result for tata harper

Her line is 100% natural, 100% non toxic and 100% effective. Baaabbyyy! Image result for tata harperWhen I tell you that from using the products only 3 times of the past day and a half I have physically seen and felt the texture difference and brightening of my face, I'm NOT lying. Which brings me to my next point. The price point is about to blow my Bougie budgetin' ass out the water lol. 

For the three products I need: purifying cleanser and cleansing oil, hydrating essence and moisturizer - before my employee discount: $300+. I'm sure y'all know when I realized how much it would be, my soul left my body lol. But now that it has re-entered and is back amongst the realm of the living, I truly believe it will be money well spent. 

I always choose to spend my money on skin or body because I want to look good without makeup and eventually look good AF naked lol. I figure since the canvas (my face) needs to be clear, it makes more sense to spend $ on skincare...That's my splurge. I don't buy designer bags, clothes or shoes...I buy bomb ass skincare! 

So in a world of material things that function as accessories, TREAT YO' SELF. Spa treatments, skincare, vacations...treat yourself to things that are tangible...that yield visible results. Get your skin on fleek and take of the world. 

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Ain't No Negativity Bih

April 21, 2017

The look when you're on the cusp of making your dream life a reality...
Photo credit/MUA: Staci Marie/Pose Artistry

A couple years back when I started my journey into MLM (multi level marketing), I was let in on a very important lesson from six and seven figure money earners: the power of personal development. Throughout our lives we are inundated with beliefs and mindsets and a lot of them are not the most conducive to living a positive and uplifting life.

Listening to audio books and hurling myself into reading about how to be a better me, how to earn tons of money in MLM, I learned how the seemingly small act of changing my thoughts could lead me to a much better and positive outlook and life. In my adulthood I have noticed highly successful celebrities, business owners and anyone who overcame extraordinary adversity proclaim quite simply and proudly "I believed I could, so I did". This single statement was at the heart of everything these successful people did. Just the belief that they could create their lives led them down an extraordinary path of abundance and far away from the original path their lives were previously destined to take.

In that vein, I have some suggested reading for you guys! Some of these I have read already or listened to (my list is marked with an *), but all I know will have some sort of value and potentially change the trajectory of your life as it stands:

The 10x Rule - Grant Cardone *
You Are a Badass - Jen Sincero*
You are a Badass At Making Money - Jen Sincero * (currently reading)
anything by John C. Maxwell (read 2 of his books) *
The Success Principles - Jack Canfield
The Slight Edge - Jeff Olson*
Life Your Life From The Front Seat - Jessica Butts*
The 4 Hour Work Week - Timothy Ferris*
The Power - Rhonda Byrne* (more in this series that I haven't read yet)
Secrets of Six-Figure Women - Barbara Stanny* (in the middle of reading this one)
Big Magic - Elizabeth Gilbert

This is by no means an exhaustive list, but it's a great starter to getting you in the right mindset to achieve any and everything you wished you could. If you're curious where to start or having some suggestions of your own, leave a comment below :).

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe


April 11, 2017

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I honestly try to comport myself with a modicum (ok maybe a little more) of manners and respect towards others. Now I'm no saint, but I consciously put effort into NOT being a complete asshole. It's difficult at times, but working in retail I have learned to reign in and control a lot of the things I would normally say and just blurt out. One thing I won't stand for is people being unprofessional and taking jabs at me or anyone else when it suits them.

Recently, I resigned (gave 2 weeks notice) from my position at the retailer I was working for to pursue both another job AND Nursing school. While I honestly don't care who is or isn't happy for me, I do care about people who I owe nothing (I repeat, not a DAMN thang) voicing their opinions to me in a useless and potentially destructive way. Unless you care about my well being or actually help support me (with $ lol), keep that negative ISH to yourself.

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Luckily, my feelings don't get hurt easily (actually I'm not even sure what those are lol), but if things that were said to me in the same sarcastic, flippant attitude were said to another person, I can see how it could really hurt their feelings or make them feel some type of way about it. I personally will just NOT stand for the bullshit. I don't and won't tolerate people who beat around the bush, are fake or who simply project themselves to be something or someone they aren't.

I shouldn't even be giving this an entire blog entry, but I won't stand for disrespect especially when I know that I strive to do the right thing. One of my biggest issues with large corporations is that they seem to lose sight of ethics and morals in the pursuit of more capital gain. It's sickening actually and it translates into some of the people they hire into their establishments. At the end of the day, you can't please everyone...but I do believe in maintaining integrity AND making money. Happy employees = happy customers = more $$$$$. Very simple formula.
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All that taken into consideration, I know that I will continue to thrive, treat others with respect and work hard to do right by people and be the best person I can be. The same can't be said for others, but I guess not everyone can live the #BougieLife. I know that I have absolutely no space or time for the mess. I have always been the type of person that believes we can ALL win, but being shady, snarky or simply trying to bring others down is NOT the way to go about that. Another life motto I like to live by : "Try Jesus (insert Buddha, Allah, or whatever God/Higher entity you serve), don't try me"
                                           Image result for stares maxinely

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Bougie On A Budget

April 3, 2017

By now you should know I have a penchant for all things bougie. BUT while my heart desires designer labels, curated experiences and the best that life has to offer, but pockets are screaming "Don't do it girl", "Think again" and "#ByeFelicia" lol. I'm going to share some of my tricks of the trade if you will that have enabled me to enjoy life without always paying full price! This is especially pertinent for students and moms (holla at me single moms). Please feel free to add your suggestions in the comments! I'd love to update and revise this starter list.

the face you make when you out here finessin' these fianaces

Ways to Be Bougie On a Budget (aka Finessin' These Finances)

1) Groupon - is and ALWAYS will be my A1 from day 1. Groupon was shootin' with me in the gym...but really. I have used Groupon since my days in NYC and it has paid off. I have been able to enjoy various activities in different states because of the wonder that is G-pon. Hats off to the founders of this wondrous company! I spent about $30 for 4 activities for me and the kids this week. That's 4 activities for 4 people for $30!!! 

2) Library - Having worked at the Lexington Public Library, they offer so many services and programs to kids and families FOR FREE! Literally it's as simple as clicking on their website and searching the master calendar to find an activity for adults, teens and kids alike. TRY IT! 

3) Kids Eat Free/Cheap days - Yeah I said it! lol There is NO shame in my game. I honestly cannot afford to spend $50+ every time our family of 3 or 5 goes out to eat. That is money out the window to me especially considering how much we spend on groceries! 

4) Where it counts, buy in BULK - I have found that bulk purchasing does not work for every facet of my life, but on things you know will be used on a daily basis, it makes cents (see what I did there?) to purchase large quantities. Costco and Sam's are my go-to's because they are the only ones in my area. What do I buy in bulk? Laundry detergent, dish washing detergent, seasoning/condiments, bottled water, toilet paper (like seriously do kids eat this stuff?!? lol), paper towels (again...we must be eating this stuff), soap and body wash, coffee and some fruit and veggies 

5) Ebates - Get this app on your phone and then attach this mug to your browser! It will save your life. For purchasing things you normally would or have to online, you get varying percentages back on your total purchase price. I've seen this go as high as 18%, Groupon last week and this week was 9%!  Click the link below to check it out and get $ for putting your friends on to savings!

6) Couponing - While I am not really good at this, if you have the time and effort to put into it I have seen it yield amazing results. You can Google how to coupon and will find tutorials from people of all walks of life. 

7) Don't eat out unless you have a discount - I used to spend like $40 a week on fast food and other stuff while working at the mall. Now that I'm doing hCG I have spent maybe $15 total in 2 weeks. Such a great way of saving. Just heed my advice...DON'T DO IT Y'ALL lol  

8) Employee discounts - Because I love beauty and the beauty industry, I have always in some capacity worked in beauty. Working in retail affords me a 25% discount of regularly priced cosmetics/ sale cosmetics and discounted clothing and other items. Working at the medspa enables me to get services at cost and products at cost as well. 

9) NEVER or RARELY buy clothing/shoes/hair care products or really anything at full price - I use my work discount on already discounted items and/or I go to Goodwill/thrift stores to get pieces for me, L, the girls and J. For hair products I try to wait for my favorite products to go on sale, shop for them online through Ebates and/or take advantage of brand specific discount codes! Discount codes = LIFE lol. 

Have any more tips to share? Comment below and I will add to the list and include you and your contribution. 

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Nursing School With a Purpose

April 2, 2017

This time 2.5 years ago. I won't be going back to EKU, but I'm back in 

As of a few days ago, I am officially accepted into Nursing school (for the 2nd time) ! This signifies so many things for me. It's a 2nd chance to get my shit together and the opportunity to live out my purpose and have the autonomy, education and financial ability to do some of the things I dream about. My goal is to be a Nurse entrepreneur in some capacity interlacing my passion for women's issues, a holistic lifestyle and my affinity for one on one interactions and relationship building.

I want the career mobility to be able to find a job literally anywhere. I want the ability to showcase my talents and truly and positively impact the lives of others. Retail cosmetics can never fill that void for me even though it's where I have spent the majority of my 20s. I want a career where I can use my brain and my empathy. I want to actually see the fruits of my labor. I am passionate about women's health. I truly believe when women are empowered in all walks of their lives it makes them better and better for their families.

I'm in this for the long haul as my eventual goal is to be a Nurse Practitioner with a DNP.  First LPN, then RN, MSN and finally DNP. I know there is so much I can bring to the profession and so much I have to offer to my future patients. I'm excited to start living in my purpose for the first time in a long time!

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

I Actually Do Blog About Beauty...

March 31, 2017

I'm sure by now y'all are TIREDT (yes with a "t") of hearing about my life lol. I actually made this blog to talk about my life AND beauty, the latter which has yet to be mentioned. As much as I am a no makeup-makeup kinda girl, mixing luxury, mid-range and drugstore brands to achieve a flawless face is a passion of mine! 

So let's talk about skin! You literally HAVE TO start with good skincare/good skin health to take your makeup to the next level. What the hell am I currently using?! Pretty much a host of things:

Cleanser: I usually use Shiseido Pureness cream or liquid or even Clarins, but when I ran out and needed something ASAP (last week), I stumbled upon and decided to try Shea Moisture African Black Soap cleanser. I love most of their hair products and it is 100% natural, paraben free AND black owned. WINNING! So far, so good. My face seems to be less oily, brighter and softer. It is pictured below. You can get it at Walmart, Target, drugstores and from their website directly. I got it for around $7.80.
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Toner: I'm really bad and don't currently use one but I LOVED a mini size I got from Clarins not too long ago as a gift with purchase. It was balancing for Oily/Combo skin. It retails for around $26, but really is worth the buy.

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Moisturizer: Now here we get complicated lol. Working in retail cosmetics and part time at the Medspa has perks baby! For day time I use Z.O. Glycogent  (retail $70) which is a gentle exfoliator with 10% glycolic and lactic acids (HALLELUJAH!). Best of all it's not harsh and it's not a mechanical exfoliation. I use this daily and then put my Shiseido Ibuki Protective moisturizer with SPF 18 (retail $45). These have been my go-tos for the past 3 weeks and my skin is GLOWING!

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Night time moisturizer is a Strivectin cream called Advanced Retinol Intensive Night Moisturizer (retail $79) . Smooths my face and makes my face and neck super soft and supple come the morning time.
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Eye cream: Ah! MY favorite. I use YSL's Youth Liberator eye cream (retail $100)  during the day and sometimes the Dark Circle Corrector (always put this after the eye cream). At night I use YSL's Temps Majeur eye cream (retail $140) which is the It has been my favorite for almost 2 years now.

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                                   Image result for ysl temps majeur eye cream

There's my round up y'all! Any products you use from this list? Any suggestions? What are some of your beauty faves?!

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe 

Safety in the Harbor

March 29, 2017

Image result for ship in the harbor is safe

I first heard this quote when I was a senior in high school. It was a year after I made the choice to go to college 650 miles away from my family for the first time ever.  I would live on my own, work a full time job, navigate public higher education, love, be heartbroken, give birth to my amazing boy, meet great people and graduate with both a degree in life and English. 

Much to the chagrin of my parents I was (and still am) stubborn as a bull. When I set my mind to something, I did it. I was tenacious, fiery and determined. I like to think I am still some of those things now, but I don't feel it. I don't feel like the fire in my bones has been ignited in a long time. So it is quite possible I am still that girl who was on the cusp of womanhood and discovery and had the world at her hands, but I need to take time and rediscover her and get back to her.

I think one important trait most of us carry in our youth is fearlessness. When channeled into the right avenues, you can accomplish great things from letting fear go! I fell in love with New York City when I was 16. I went to stay with my friend Erika in Washington Heights and KNEW that I had to be in this place! August 2006, with $1200 saved up, school supplies and some stuff for my bedroom, my parents and I made the 12 hour drive and I moved into a 3 bedroom apartment with an awesome family of strangers near Central Park West. When I look back on that, it's amazing how that chapter of my life began. By the end of August I was a Freshman at City College of New York in Harlem. 

what a few years in NYC did to me lol; Photo credit: Leon Photo Werks (RIP)

I don't necessarily think that it was my absence of fear, but it was my drive to be different, do different and follow my heart that pushed me to move away from Kentucky. Much like I knew back then, Kentucky has nothing for me other than my family. I feel no real ties to this place and have always felt like I don't belong here. It's not home to me, it is just a place I have spent the majority of my life. A holding pen if you well. 

I talked to a coworker about this yesterday. I miss early to mid  2000s Cicely. I want to get her back. I want to be her again. I'm 29 and don't want to be a shell of a woman, I want to live on my own terms and by my rules. I want to go against the grain like I'm used to doing and learn and love my way. Although having a child with special needs complicates things, I don't want that to be my crutch. Before you get all judgmental, I know that my child comes first. Any place I move or anything I decide to do HAS to be an excellent fit for him. If I got the opportunity of a lifetime, but L wasn't able to get the help he needs, then it's not the right fit for me or us. 
I had sauce y'all lol. this was 2008 

2008 my first collaboration with Samantha Lennon MUA and Earl Leon -photog

I said all of that to say this...Life is entirely too short to be scared to take the chance, quit the job, write the book, marry the girl or guy, leave behind everything you've ever known or simple do whatever it is that makes you happy or be your real, true self. 2017 and the rest of MY life is not meant to be lived in fear. It's not to say that you won't be scared or that you're not allowed to be, but don't succumb to the fear and don't live in regret. 


March 28, 2017

Photo: Staci Marie MUA: Makeup by Kristin Gray
So I know, I know it has been a long time (25 days if you want to be exact), but it has been with good reason! I have really had a lot going on...I feel like this month has truly been a blur. In my usual journalistic style, I will give you a recap:

Tax season!
That tax return hit so I did what everyone usually does...I spent most of my money like a responsible adult paying up and getting caught up on bills :/...yeah, wonderful! lol

Began to Tap/Practice EFT
So I have dabbled in EFT and tapping before, but this month I really decided to step things up. I try to do it if not every day then every other day and if nothing else I feel better because of doing it. If you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about...go on YouTube and search for Brad Yates and then try anything listed under his "Quickie"'re welcome

Started the hCG Diet
It is probably the hardest thing I have ever done! lol Luckily, I have been steady losing weight and I'm at exactly 11 lb down today! I needed to do it! When I started I was like 40 lb heavier than my original HIGHEST WEIGHT EVER. It was scary and shocking. I knew that the time was now to make the change! 

School now or career now?
I'm facing the decision now to continue my life in beauty or return to Nursing school?! Staying in Kentucky my options are extremely limited as to what I can do and become. We only have really 4 major beauty retailers with a 5th on the way. Because Lexington is so small, just about everyone knows each other and has worked together or for the same companies in some capacity...I'm tired of that. I feel in my bones that I need to move out of the state to advance in beauty, but to where? When? How? I've been praying and putting things into action to help me make my decision. I do know that God and the Universe is looking out for me, so now I just await the sign or the right opportunity. I feel stifled and I need, no actually I demand freedom. 

Being a better Mom
I feel like as a working Mom it is super easy to get caught up in work and not focus on your kid. That's unacceptable for me in my life right now. I have been making a conscious effort to work on Liam's homework every night after work and have pep talks with him in the morning, Every day for the past week I've told him to have the BEST day. He took it a step further and told me that he's going to have a "rad" day or an "amazing" day. Either one will suffice! :) He's an amazing little boy and I'm trying to nurture and let him grow into an awesome human being. 

So that's the 411 on me! Hope all has been well out there in blogger world! 

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Living Your Best Life

March 3, 2017

I jokingly use this phrase, but I really mean it. When I see my friends and family out here succeeding and doing great things, I tell them they are "living their best life". I mean living a life so good that you can see the happiness radiating and the joy of life spilling from their pores. True happiness, purposeful living and creating an amazing life,

I realized also that I have been not doing enough of that! I talk to God very casually instead of doing what I call traditional prayer. I talk to God and ask him to show me what he wants me to do, ask him what he has for me and to grant me the patience to wait on it. In 29 years, I can say that His timing has always been right. I truly believe that God can speak to and through us. It is up to us to read and see the signs.

I am way more spiritual than religious. The life lessons and things I believe I have discovered in my spirituality far surpass anything I have experienced in life. I am still trying to decipher sometimes what God wants for me and how I can get to live the life I want and feel I deserve, but I feel confident that I will get there.

But now cha'girl is on some new-new! I'm going to be one of those people I accuse of living their best life. I am literally ALWAYS telling people that they can do things and have the power within them, but I'm not practicing what I preach. So on March 3, 2017, here's to living your best muthafucking life! May you stumble, may you learn, may you fail, may you succeed, but most importantly may you do it on YOUR own terms.

The face you make when you out here comin' for what's yours to get! 

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe

Too Much Booty Babe?

February 27, 2017

I have never been petite. Like at all. EVER. in my life. Unless you count birth and the couple of years thereafter lol. Growing up I was always a bigger child, both in height and size, but was definitely active. I played basketball from age 6/7 until I was 17. I did Gymnastics for a small stint and generally loved to be outdoors and being active when I wasn't reading a book. 

As women, we are constantly scrutinizing and criticizing our bodies. It's actually pretty fucking sad because women are such magical and amazing beings! At my best I have lost about 75 pounds and kept it off for about a year. Getting out of healthy habits and not making time for exercise caused me to gain all of that weight back and then more. I'm truly thankful that my blood tests have always good, my hormones are not out of whack, but I still struggle with my wright. I realize that some people are predisposed to gain weight easily and have to always be mindful of the things they're eating. I am one of those people and it will be a struggle for me always. That is not to say that I can't lose weight or that I am incapable of being slim, but the societal and medical standards to which I am supposed to adhere will probably never happen for me and I'm okay with that.

thick slim lol 

My 20s have been a roller coaster of weights, but I do try to maintain at least some healthy practices. I love drinking copious amounts of water (FIJI if I'm gettin' REAL bougie lol). At my fittest and happiest, I enjoyed working out 4 to 5 days a week for 30 minutes to an hour. And although not very fun I do enjoy eating relatively clean because I love how my body feels and how it reacts i.e. weight loss.

me last year trying to get my mojo back. I did a before video

Although most women struggle with weight during pregnancy and have some body image issues, my weight decreased when pregnant with L and my body image issues were much better while pregnant. I appreciated my body for the fat burning, baby making machine that it was and I ate healthy, stayed active and felt great for the majority of my pregnancy. Now eight years later and significantly heavier than I was pregnant with L, I am feeling the strain of this extra weight and also the changes that come along with being older and having more weight on my joints and the rest of my body.

I love myself and my body currently, I know that fitness needs to be an integral part of my life again. I come from a family with multiple maladies and I know at this point the only way to avoid or lessen the chance of developing these illnesses is to get my weight under control and be commit a lifetime of healthy eating and exercising. These are also things that I would love to pass on to L and to engage in physical activity as a family.

me at one of my heavier weights in 2015, but still #iSlay

So this post is me taking a stand once again against my weight and continuing onto the next leg of my weight loss journey. I have to do this for myself, my son and my overall well being. I'm always gonna have bawdy, but I'd rather keep it on the less gut more but tip lol. We have one body and one life and I am literally going to try to do my best to treat both like the treasures they are!

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe 

29 is So Divine!

February 18, 2017

Hi Everyone!

February 1 29 years ago the Bougie Beauty Babe was born - literally! I can't believe this is the last year of my 20s! What an adventure it has been! 2016 was an entire year of learning. There is just so much to reflect on!

Here's what my 20s consisted of:

me and baby Liam :) 

Worst picture of life! lol think I took this my Senior year...was THAT happy to be graduating lmfao

20-22 - Had been working in skincare and beauty for a few months. I was in my last years of college and at 21 ended a horrendous relationship and leaving a person that didn't and never would serve me, then giving birth to my son. Graduated college at age 22, my son was 9 months old. Founded Liam Artistry, LLC. Did some modeling gigs in NYC. Dealing with being a new and single mom. Started working for Benefit cosmetics freelance and dealt with unemployment for the 1st time. Blogging my way through it, thinking I might become a lawyer. Took and studied for the LSAT.

22-23 - a whole bunch of discovery and dating trying to figure out motherhood and a hectic life in NYC as a single mom. Got some drinking and partying out of my system. Decided to move back to KY at 23. Tried dating in was a hot ass mess.

23-24 - living back home with my parents and my toddler son, trying to figure out WTF I was gonna do with my life and make sense of this damn Bachelor's degree I have with no clue wth I want to be when I grow up lol.  Went on weight loss journey to find my happiness. My Godson was born!

25-29 - Got certified as a CNA & Medical Interpreter. Got an amazing opportunity to meet and work with an amazing plus size designer in Seattle named Liesl Binx! I LOVE her!!! I met and have a relationship with a man and his 2 kids that I love. Quit working at the hospital and gained back some sleep, sanity and joy. Completed one semester of Nursing school and had to take a break. Liam was officially diagnosed with ASD.  Began working for YSL & Armani (2 companies I love). My brother Chris died when I was 27 and I miss him every day. Became a cat mom to Luna.

I'm sure there are some things I am forgetting, but I feel have been through a lot of life in just my 20s. There is a saying "Thank God I don't look like what I've been through"! Amen!

Until again,

Bougie Beauty Babe
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