bad and bougie

31 Lessons in 31 Years/31 Thangs About Me

February 1, 2019

When you grown. Photo by: Erica Lee Photography (2018)/ MUA: Makeup by Kristin Gray 


My favorite national holiday has circled back around another year: my birthday! I saw a post on ScaryMommy.com that inspired this blog and title. I wanted to share 31 truths I've learned in my 31 trips around the sun and mix in some fun facts about me. 

31. I can do bad all by myself.

30. "What you seek is seeking you" - Rumi

29.  Nothing happens before it's time. This is such a hard lesson to accept. But as I get older, I am more at ease. 

28. Quality ALWAYS outweighs quantity of friends. I have some of the best people in my circle and it is only a select few. 

27. "To thine ownself be true" - that sums it up for itself

26. A "no" doesn't mean forever, it just means right now. Be open and receptive to other options and possibilities you weren't considering. 

25. Nothing can ever happen if you don't take a chance. The older I get, the more hesitant I have become about making exciting, new, promising decisions. This was not a problem in my youth. I chalk that up to being a single mom in a single income household and bearing the brunt of the responsibility. What I have learned thus far in my womanhood/motherhood journey is that what works for me is usually what will work for Liam. If I can see the benefit for me and us as a family, then that's the green light. My parenting goal in this life is to raise a child/children who don't have to get therapy to recover from childhood trauma and to be present in my children's life. 

24. I have a secret desire to own a mini farm lol. I want a cow, about 3 dogs, 2 cats, chickens, a garden and a good size house on about 5 acres. Now, I don't know how to farm or garden, but I'm willing to learn lol. 

23. Motherhood for me has been one of THE most stressful, fulfilling and life-changing adventures and aside from having more money, there is absolutely nothing I would change.  

22. I used to have constant anxiety about providing for myself and my son, but EVERY TIME things work out for the best. "Won't He do it?!"

21. My favorite color is Cerulean.

20. I was born on a Monday.

19. Giorgio Armani Luminous Silk is my absolute favorite foundation (My color is #10 if anyone is feeling gifty lol).

18. I prefer lipgloss to lipstick, but love them both.

17. I am NOT a cat person, but my pound cat (got her from Lexington Human Society) Luna is my pride and joy lol.

16. My mama is one of my favorite people in this world. (That don't mean I don't love my Daddy because I certainly do)
photo by Christina Terrano/ HMUA: me

 15. I know with certainty in my heart that I will meet my soulmate/life partner this year. Don't ask me how I know, but I do.

14. I'm intuitive and as I like to joke, ALMOST psychic. I have a way of sensing/feeling things that I usually can't explain. I am an ENFJ personality.

13. Liam was on my short list of baby names and when I saw him for the first time, I knew the name I picked fit perfectly.

12. This is year 10 for me as a single mom. I'm a whole decade deep!

11. I've never been married, but come close...

10. I believe working on yourself is key to getting better in all aspects and to helping those around you.

9. A dream/goal of mine is to have my own talk show a la Oprah meets Ricki Lake with a dash of Cardi B lol

8. Nursing is a 2nd career for me.

7. I'm a candle junkie. I love candles. Check out www.hausofhoodoo.com and www.poshcandleco.com

6. I like to surround myself with positivity and flowers (I often by myself flowers)

5. Outside of childhood, I've only had two good Valentine's Days. But this year that will change (because I'm taking matters into my own hands)

4. I recorded my previous weight loss journey on Youtube...it's still up for you to see lol

3. There are very few people you can rely on in life. The ones you can, be sure to cherish and honor them while you have the chance. 

2. Be thankful/grateful every day. A positive mindset and outlook always spawn positive actions in your life. This is NON-negotiable. 

1. No love compares to the love you should/need to have for yourself. You have to love you first to love anyone else. That doesn't mean that you won't have your bad days and days of doubt, but you need to know that you are a BAMF all day erryday. Okuurrrrrrr? *Cardi*
photo by: Christina Terrano/HMUA: me



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Bougie On A Budget

April 3, 2017

By now you should know I have a penchant for all things bougie. BUT while my heart desires designer labels, curated experiences and the best that life has to offer, but pockets are screaming "Don't do it girl", "Think again" and "#ByeFelicia" lol. I'm going to share some of my tricks of the trade if you will that have enabled me to enjoy life without always paying full price! This is especially pertinent for students and moms (holla at me single moms). Please feel free to add your suggestions in the comments! I'd love to update and revise this starter list.

the face you make when you out here finessin' these fianaces

Ways to Be Bougie On a Budget (aka Finessin' These Finances)

1) Groupon - is and ALWAYS will be my A1 from day 1. Groupon was shootin' with me in the gym...but really. I have used Groupon since my days in NYC and it has paid off. I have been able to enjoy various activities in different states because of the wonder that is G-pon. Hats off to the founders of this wondrous company! I spent about $30 for 4 activities for me and the kids this week. That's 4 activities for 4 people for $30!!! 

2) Library - Having worked at the Lexington Public Library, they offer so many services and programs to kids and families FOR FREE! Literally it's as simple as clicking on their website and searching the master calendar to find an activity for adults, teens and kids alike. TRY IT! 

3) Kids Eat Free/Cheap days - Yeah I said it! lol There is NO shame in my game. I honestly cannot afford to spend $50+ every time our family of 3 or 5 goes out to eat. That is money out the window to me especially considering how much we spend on groceries! 

4) Where it counts, buy in BULK - I have found that bulk purchasing does not work for every facet of my life, but on things you know will be used on a daily basis, it makes cents (see what I did there?) to purchase large quantities. Costco and Sam's are my go-to's because they are the only ones in my area. What do I buy in bulk? Laundry detergent, dish washing detergent, seasoning/condiments, bottled water, toilet paper (like seriously do kids eat this stuff?!? lol), paper towels (again...we must be eating this stuff), soap and body wash, coffee and some fruit and veggies 

5) Ebates - Get this app on your phone and then attach this mug to your browser! It will save your life. For purchasing things you normally would or have to online, you get varying percentages back on your total purchase price. I've seen this go as high as 18%, Groupon last week and this week was 9%!  Click the link below to check it out and get $ for putting your friends on to savings!  https://www.ebates.com/r/MISSCI116?eeid=28187

6) Couponing - While I am not really good at this, if you have the time and effort to put into it I have seen it yield amazing results. You can Google how to coupon and will find tutorials from people of all walks of life. 

7) Don't eat out unless you have a discount - I used to spend like $40 a week on fast food and other stuff while working at the mall. Now that I'm doing hCG I have spent maybe $15 total in 2 weeks. Such a great way of saving. Just heed my advice...DON'T DO IT Y'ALL lol  

8) Employee discounts - Because I love beauty and the beauty industry, I have always in some capacity worked in beauty. Working in retail affords me a 25% discount of regularly priced cosmetics/ sale cosmetics and discounted clothing and other items. Working at the medspa enables me to get services at cost and products at cost as well. 

9) NEVER or RARELY buy clothing/shoes/hair care products or really anything at full price - I use my work discount on already discounted items and/or I go to Goodwill/thrift stores to get pieces for me, L, the girls and J. For hair products I try to wait for my favorite products to go on sale, shop for them online through Ebates and/or take advantage of brand specific discount codes! Discount codes = LIFE lol. 

Have any more tips to share? Comment below and I will add to the list and include you and your contribution. 

Until again,
Bougie Beauty Babe
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